The Continuing Story of Rocky Raccoon

Your inside is out and your outside is in
Your outside is in and your inside is out
So come on, come on,
Come on is such a joy
Come on is such a joy
Come on let's make it easy
Come on let's make it easy
Make it easy, make it easy,

 Everybody's got something to hide except for me and my monkey.

~The Beatles 

Sorry that this post is a bit late. My reasons are discussed below. 

This picture means nothing. Or does it?

In talking to different associates about the blog, I have found that some people read way too much into the blog. They think I am talking about them when I am in fact not. On the other hand, some people do not read nearly enough into it. They never even realize that I am talking about them. Maybe the latter of these two is the more desirable type of erroneous reading. Nevertheless, suffice it to say that one needs to read these posts through the correct lens. There is a leveled understanding with which this blog must be read. 

Some readers have only recently joined us. Welcome. But you should probably stop reading right now, since this post will make you realize your female associate associates with a weirdo.

So yes, this post will not be for everyone. Be warned that it will seem like a riddle at times. This is because I like having fun with both of the aforementioned groups of readers. Also, as I have indicated a few other times, my readership comes from a rather disparate collection of demographics. I have women in their 80s who read this blog. I also have teenage boys who have been introduced to the blog. For these reasons, this post today could only be for a select readership. But I digress.

Since next week will most likely (?) feature the start of a three part treatise on some of my current research in social statistics, this week's post will pretty much just serve the purpose of filling the gap between last week's post and next week's post. It probably will get 30,000 views, since usually that is how it seems to be: The most inane posts get the most views.

This picture means nothing. Or does it?

Here is how this post works. I am going to list 20 reasons why this post was not published yesterday. Some of them are factual. Some of them are not. Some of them are factual, but are not reasons I was unable to write a post this week. Some of them are just what Peyton Manning calls "Ice Cream."

For the "I like to hike in suits" type of  men.
From my personal study of fashion and the use of blue and maroon.

1.  I had a test on Thursday. It was sort of a big deal, since the professor is also the graduate coordinator and I had to look good. Although I am not sure if I should attempt to impress a 46- year-old man that dresses like Justin Bieber on Tuesdays and like he just had a photo shoot with GQ Style (see above photo for example) on Thursdays. That's what happens when you graduate from an Ivy League school.
2. I had a discussion with one of my black associates about linear regression and analysis of variance calculations for grain consumption data.
3. You never give me your money, you only give me your funny paper. 
4. Because Obama Cares. Even when you need to perjure, he is there for you. 
5. I discovered that if you play Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon along side the Wizard of Oz that the music explains the movie perfectly.
6. Because I live in a one room school house. Okay it is not a school house. But it is only one room. Unless you count the bathroom, which did come with a door. (The bathroom having a door was actually presented by the owner as a selling point).
7. I cannot play the flute. At least not well. I actually learned the flute at one point, but Mr. T wanted a trombone player in his band. So I joined general music and sang about the Sign of the Beaver and rockin' my baby in the bosom of Abraham. This was in sixth grade.
8. Someone wrecked their car into a light pole by the roundabout and I had to walk home because the bus could not get past. The bus driver actually had to call and get special permission to let us off at a place that was not a stop (i.e the middle of the road).
9. Julio and I were down by the school yard and he ended up getting in trouble with the law. Luckily it was not for perjury. (Note that Julio is a boy's name, not a girl's name. Hence it could not be referring to a girl). I just told the officer my name was Al and he told me his name was Betty, which is not a name I personally would use if I was chasing hardened criminals every day. But to each his or her own.
10. D-Wag, the long haired elf. Or maybe it was D-Swag, the long haired hippster elf.



"With Hair Strands"-Pixel on Pixel. © 2015 JMC Inc.

11. Do  you know the Copper Top, the Copper Top? Do you know the Copper Top who lives at Park Place Lane? Most of you do not. Familiarize yourselves with the Cu Top. Some of you will have that chance on October 10th. Others of you will need to wait until after school is over. Others of you have no idea what this even means. (See Matthew 13:9). Suffice it to say that I might just slide in for the clay medal. That is of course unless H.U.G or his sister slide in before me. Or the boy with the triangle head. But remember, you heard February 26th, 2016 from me first, right here on this blog. That is when the bronze is going down. This of course only pertains to a select number of you.
12. I had to spend too much time this week clarifying where I used to live. This in part is because Obama cares, and is also in part because some people insist on calling The Pope "Pope-Vatican." Some things you just do not need to clarify. That is one of them. There are others I will not mention, as to not hurt feelings. (p.s. If I have made it this far without offending every single reader, it would be a literal miracle.)
13. I did not pick up chicks this week. Maybe this weekend I will do so. Some of you are already aware of my forays into agriculture. Others of you are still unaware, even after the past two months of blog posts. Here is a picture of Jak, one of my good associates from Nampa, ID. He chose not to buy the house, however.
    
    

    

    Why Hello! My name is Lil' Jak and I give you a thumbs up.

14. I may or may not have watched a snippet of a Pawn Stars episode where a man is offered $600,000 for a guitar that belonged to Jimi Hendrix. And the man declined the money! Although I think the whole encounter was staged, since later the guitar shows up for sale in a nearby guitar shop.
15. Jay Gilmar and I went up the hill on a short climb. We saw some old people and also a man with an overgrown Abe Lincoln beard.
16. Friday is pizza night. But Thursday is ramen night. Most likely the best ramen I ever ate was on a Thursday night. The type of ramen that I had probably most closely resembled tonkotsu (豚骨) ramen. There perhaps was some mixture of miso ramen in there, but I am admittedly not an expert.. Nevertheless, I have long been seeking to convince people that there is a big difference between ramen cooked by hand and ramen cooked by foot. There also is a big difference between ramen cooked by hand and Top Ramen.  
17. She gave me the crime rate data backwards. Luckily, my black associate figured this out. 
18. Right after I posted last week about my being agricultural, my agricultural college decided to bring ten or so large tractors onto campus and park them. I guess this was just to get people excited for the 2015 Reaper Races. (Three weeks from today. Fontanelle, IA is hosting. And we even get a day off of school).
19. Jeddy G. has resigned himself to running marathons. No words yet on the rest of the children.
20. Finally, I am not going to lie, I did spend a little time this week looking into airfare and hotels. I am currently taking applicants for a vacation next spring. (May 14th or so?).  Be warned, the acceptance rate might be low since admissions are tough. You know where to find me though.

This is a gold mine BTW. A gold mine with lots of copper. Perhaps some of you have already sussed that out.