My Grad School Options.

To dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free,
Silhouetted by the sea, circled by the circus sands,
With all memory and fate driven deep beneath the waves.

~Bob Dylan.

In the past two weeks, I have been in four different states touring universities. As many of you know, I am going to be starting a PhD program in the fall. I have eliminated my choices down to three options. I am accepted to each of these programs, so now I just need to decide where to go. This will be a post on what I saw as I toured these different universities. Add your comments as to where you think I should end up. If you just want to read about the schools, skip the next few paragraphs.

First off, there are some straight up freaks out there in the world. I will not describe all the body parts I have seen pierced. Dennis Rodman is not the oddest person to ever set foot in Seattle. To each his or her own I guess. Neck tattoos are just an odd practice. And it is sad to see otherwise pretty young ladies smoking at age 23. (Tattoos and pierced noses are one thing, and indeed a culture, but how in the world can you grow up in the modern era and become a smoker?)

I also saw a few fringe people. "Outliers." "Freakonomics." These people were what you could call "odd," but ultimately were pretty nice I feel. They just were from a different era. The pictures below resemble actual footage I took.

 

Let me add that I of course come from one of the weirdest universities in the US. And I have met a lot of freaks right here where I go to school. Freakery can be very subtle. In fact, subtle freakery is perhaps more disturbing. It is by nature secretive. 

Right after casting judgment on the neck tattoo people of the world, let me also add that I had it reaffirmed to me that sometimes "we," the "peculiar people" like to think we have a corner on all things good: modesty, abstaining from drugs and alcohol, blah blah blah. Yes, I met a lot of people who live very differently than I do. Yes, I met beer chuggers. But I also met people who had the poise to carry themselves in a dignified way without needing to build fences around the law. I met a lot of non "card carriers" who were more modest than many of the face-painted people whose feet mince by me everyday. And Surprise! A man can have a beard and not be a drug addict. And a man can be clean shaven and chug beer like a lumberjack.

Now, we all know well these things I have said above. Nothing new to see. And these statements are not the point of this post. They are merely observations relevant to my travels looking at graduate schools. Ultimately I learned that I have freaks living in my own backyard (No, not the Sterns and their monkeys) and there are perfectly normal people living outside my state. Again, not a revelation, just an observation of known fact.

Here are the three schools I am considering as my final options. I list facts about each. Perhaps give feedback as to what you think, because as of right now I have no idea which one is the best. As far as I know, none of the readers of the blog go to any of these schools. I use code names for the schools to allow me to be more open about what I saw without publicly bad mouthing these places. Don't work too hard trying to match these code names with mascots. You will not succeed. In reviewing these places, I might make qualitative judgements without defining terms. What is "bad weather?" What are "a lot of drinkers?" So on and so forth. Yet I feel that leaving these terms in an ambiguous state actually allows us to get a better feel for what the school really is. 

The Claw.

• The weather here is okay. Not great winters, but survivable. It does rain a lot though. I was here for three days and it rained non stop for two of them.
• This is a beer and drugs school. I am not going to say "illegal drugs," since we do not always have the same laws everywhere. So let's just say "drugs." And beer. It seemed like every place we went, the lead professor was offering to share his booze. He also doubled as our van driver, so that was comforting.
• The cost of living here is very low. Especially compared to what I would make in terms of stipend. 
• This school is pretty isolated, but that could be a good thing. It means low pollution and access to nature.
• They have a professor named Bob Dylan. Okay, he spells it Dillon, but still.
• There is not a huge job market locally for my field, but within a 150 mile radius or so, there is a lot of opportunity. Maybe even a top 3 city for my profession.
• The amount of LDS people living in this area is pretty low, but they do have a singles branch for those of us still going to the "specialty units" (As opposed to the general "mutt of all trades" wards). 
• I also am pretty sure that about 2/3 of this school is Asian. Yet, alas, there are no specialty Church units for them. Not that it matters to me anyway, since I am not the right race. But neither is Jimmy--and it's his home state.

The Paw. 

• The weather here is amazing in the winter and survivable in the summer. This could clue you in as to where it is located. 
• This is a coffee school. I am sure people here drink beer, but no one offered to buy me any and the lead professor himself entirely abstained. The lead guy also had more head on his head and face than some grizzly bears have on their entire body. Yes, back hair can be combed up and over your bald spot.
• Everyone was wearing swimming suits when I arrived on campus. This seems to be common attire. Sort of strange for a place with so little water.
• This school has the strongest program and is situated in the best job market of the three schools.
• There are a decent amount of LDS people in this area. They have multiple singles wards. No word on other specialty wards.

The Thaw.

• The weather here is bad for pretty much the entire school year. And the air quality is awful. I hate to say it, but my vision of this city is that of a coal mining town from the 50s. This is not what the town is actually like, but that is how I picture it.
• This school has offered me the most money. It comes with a few technical caveats however, so I am not totally sold on this offer. Sometimes more pay also means more work. And $1800 more a year may not be enough to make up for other concerns.
• This is a.....beer school? Maybe? All I know is it is not a coffee school and it is not a drug school. So beer school it is. I actually have no idea what people do in this city.
• The local job market for my field is not necessarily very strong here. Especially if I do not want to research ballistics or bovines. But it is at least on the right side of the continent to find work in my field.
• There are a number of LDS people here I think. There also are a lot of anti-Mormons. And a lot of people that dislike my current school. Sometimes those sets are distinct. 

Conclusion.

There are of course a few factors that are impossible to predict. What if I go to The Thaw and the whole city is hit with a flu epidemic? What if I go to The Claw and it turns out that their entire program goes under water? What if I go to The Paw and get entangled in a professor's back hair and beard? (So that's why beards are so bad!) 

Then there is the whole issue of not being married. I have a few associates who found their spouse after moving cities. What if they had gone to a different city? We have no way of knowing what would have happened. We could argue that no matter where they had gone they would have gotten married. Yet obviously not everywhere had the magic touch else they would have received admission to the marriage club sooner. Who knows. As they say, "There are plenty of fish in the sea." This guy caught one.

Good fishing, right? Straight from the Bayou. Or the circus freak show. Also keep in mind that there is so much trash in the ocean it actually has its own Wikipedia article.

Comment below if you have thoughts.